TECOW EM Cell Group 1

life hiatus, and 2 tickets to mexico please! by sangzee
February 13, 2009, 12:25 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

wow.. too many times have i landed on a thursday thinking, where did all the days go?

i gotta admit, i’ve been quite lost in the world these days; i havent got a clue in what i’m to do with my present issues, future, and other stuff… i wish to escape, but its not like i could put my life on hold and go off to somewhere like mexico or something.

i’ve been thinking a lot about what to do in life and what roads i should take. it wasnt too bad just thinking about it until other problems started trickling in. my envisioned future that seemed so great eventually became blurry and now, almost hard to see.  i try to deal with smaller issues first to get it out of the way, but all that creates is newer ones making it harder to turn to its beginning.

i recently had a light fight with my mom regarding school and my behaviour these days. and as a typical 18 year old, or should i say a child, no one really wants to hear your parents’ scolding. so she’s yelling at me.. well first of all, our convo started with me just mentioning how i wont be able to go to korea (exchange program) if i do get into the concurrent education program, which then ended up with her criticizing me on how un- yul-shim-hee i was living life and how unloving i’ve become towards her. it’s not that she’s not important or not a priority, but i really wanted to get some things out of the way first, and i hoped that she understood my present situation, but i guess she saw things differently.

i probably do have attitude problems or some sort of anger-management issues, or i’m just a very ‘an eye for an eye’ person. i know han msn/The Bible says to not be like the pharisees and like only those who like you back and hate those who hate you, but boy-oh-boy when i see that grimace on my mom, my bad-attitude just comes popping out. it’s so hard for me to fake a smile infront of her or be the first to change the direction of the mood. i really hope and i pray to God to help me become the person i was back then and i hope you’d all pray for me as well. ( But um please dont put me on the spot for a prayer session, but to keep me in the back of your minds)

btw, i do love my mom with all my heart and all my soul its just that if she only knew how lost i was, i’m sure she’d  understand everything too.